Death Note
by EarnestInBerlin
Summary: So after being kicked out by Yuki again, Shuichi finds the most interesting notebook falling flat on his face.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I was being random, so please… don't hurt me!

**DEATH NOTE**

In the world of the dead, there were bones rotting on the floor carcass after carcass flowing never ending every minute a dead body expires on earth. There were no order and cleanliness didn't exist here. No one believed in the saying 'Cleanliness is next to godliness' and for good reason.

In the world of the dead, there was a group of gods that ruled over whether or not a person in the human should live or die with a notebook. Not the usually sexy all clad in long overcoats, Muraki-looking kind of shinigamis but the ugly deformed types of death gods that no living or dead fan girl would write about. They're so ugly that this- who is a self proclaimed fan girl herself- author wishes not to describe them at all.

"Hey, want to do something fun?" said the god of death with the Indian hat on his head, his teeth poking out on his long snout.

"Well, what do you propose we do?" asked one of his companions, a little monster. His round head was encased with brown skin and with the back dotted with diamonds of varying colors. In his hands he carried a notebook, a plain black notebook with the words Death Note written on the cover in eerie thin letters.

"Well… we can do this…" the trying-hard-to-look-like-an-Indian shinigami, with his sharp nailed fingers, he picked the note from the other's grasp and threw it to the whirling pool on the other side of the realm.

The small shinigami body turned white as he saw his precious Death Note chucked away and sucked to the world of the human beings. His jaw practically detached itself from the owner's head and fell to the ground with a slight thud.

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR??" The jewel headed shinigami waved his tiny fisted hands in the air with vein signs popping on his head.

"Well, you asked what we are going to do, right." He picked his ear in a way that supposed to look. But instead, it ended up making a horrid sight that even his companion shinigami had to look away in disgust.

"Oh relax, jewel head, it's not like were going to let the punk who gets it keep it" the taller shinigami waved a hand.

"But what about that time with Ryuuku...!"

"Oh come on..."

The small shinigami, shook with a nonexistent cold air dripping down his spine, "Well, you better make sure I get it back!"

"Don't worry It's going to be soo much fun..."

**(SPACE HERE)**

The door opened, and with one swift kick, Shuichi found himself flying to the streets. There he goes soaring in the air for a bit before his face met in an untimely manner on the hard asphalt ground.

"And stay out, baka!" the angry voice of Yuki rang for the neighbors to hear with that out he slammed the door with the sound clicks ending his role for this small show.

The boy, his pink hair in disarray, was still trying to knock out the dizziness in his system. The swirls in his eyes haven't disappeared yet as they went on going round and round, his eyes not returning to their original state just yet. He was in what most people would call this form, chibi and he had his hands over his head, trying to stop his brain from running circles. A small 'kyah' escaped his lips, when he finally stationed his head to stay put on his shoulders.

The 'spectators' (composed of an old lady watering her hedges), watched the whole scene from her well-kept garden.

"Yuki kicked me out again…" the mentioned above pink haired 'brat' sighed. Then Shuichi, for god knows what reason, looked up to the sky without any warning something fell flat on his face. The impact of the thing that fell on his face had rendered him to fall back again on the ground- this time three to four feet lower than before, with his outline tracing the layers of dirt.

Old granny went on tiptoes as she tried to check from her hedges if the boy was all right but didn't move from her spot.

For a moment, silence reined the whole scene.

There was a teddy bear crossing the street to get to the candy store.

Not that anybody cares.

Back to the injured boy…

"Itai!!!!" Shuichi screamed as he pulled himself out of his body shaped hole. A red rectangle mark formed on his face, the spot where the unidentified object smacked him from before.

He rubbed the red sore spot- that was shaped like a square- on his face.

"What the hell was that for?!" he raised a fist to the heaven. The pink haired brat glared at the sky but nothing happened, and the old lady looked up to but didn't see anything else from the clouds.

"Hm… what's this?" Shuichi looked at the offensive thing that marked his face, "Death Note?"


	2. Chapter 2

**DEATH NOTE**

Yuki sits in his study like he always does ever single day of his not really normal life. No part of his body moved except for his head and his brain. He is trapped in his own prison cell with the deadline as his punishment and the laptop as his only tool.

Then his hands stopped typing, frozen in the middle of a paragraph.

There was a strange feeling inside of him, striking through his chest like a samurai sword, cutting a nice clean line from head to toe.

His back went rigid and his eyes opened wide.

He clutched the clothe that was on the left side of his chest. The blond writer doubled over on his swivel chair as the intensity started to wrack him.

"What is this…?"

_Yuki…_

He took a deep breath of frustration as the pain wouldn't stop.

_Yuki…_

God damn it, Yuki thought a migraine attacked his aching head. That must be the source of that voice, there's no one inside the house to call his name.

_Yuki.. _

Terror stroked him and he didn't like to be under its caress. He found himself on the floor, of the swivel chair as it moved away from him. His knees were on the ground, the hand that did not hold on to his shirt tried to hold his heavy frame up. He was panting really hard. There were beads of sweat crawling on the side of his face as he gritted his teeth.

As he was about to fall on the ground, his arm was already bending his nose meeting the smooth floor. He was going to fall.

But the aching stopped.

He didn't move as he let his breath return normal. When it did, he pulled himself up with the help of the table top. His body was shivering from the sudden burst; it took quite a while before he found himself on his seat again in front of the lap top's screen.

What has just happened?

He shook his head and attempted to return to work. The pressure of what happened before left him shaken, even a bit scared.

"What… the hell… was that?"

**(SPACE HERE)**

A/N: Yeah, really what the hell was that? Oh dear, I suck at comedy...


	3. Chapter 3

**DEATH NOTE**

Shuichi was staring at the most hideous being his violet eyes has set on. Sure there was Tohma with his 'fuck me, I'm a pimp' fashion sense but at least he has what everyone calls a 'face'. The thing he is looking at right now has one too. But it wasn't even that type of ugly that plastic surgery could cut and save.

"Hello…" it said.

Oh no, plastic surgery would prove futile for this thing.

Shuichi had to call the thing, 'it'. The reason being it was a deformed being, his height just up to the singer's shoulders. This little monster was already introduced in the first chapter, the one with all the diamonds on his little head.

"Um… hi", the boy greeted, the boy lifted his hand, as if trying to give the small monster a bit of a wave. Shuichi wasn't scared for some reason, though the fact that he was staring at the most revolting entity the world could spit at him should be enough reason to scream and hide.

No, the singer was in no way intimated by a being that was shorter than him.

Even if that being was a tad bit on the scary side.

"Well… um… yeah…" the monster scratched the back of his head, a sweat drop forming "I think introductions are… well, you know… nice"

For a moment, the pink haired pop star could only stare at the thing before, "Oh yes! Well… I'm Shindou Shuichi…" Shuichi never ever had trouble holding out his hand for people to shake, but now as he took a peek at those extremely sharp nails that might drive holes on his offered hand; he was almost on the verge of reconsidering.

"Oh, the gay pop star?"

An arrow shot out of nowhere and pierced Shuichi's bleeding heart, "Yeah… the pop star" He really had to leave the gay part behind.

"Well, we've heard so much about you in the shinigami world"

"The shi… shi… shinigami… world?"

"Yeah, you know where I live… the shinigami world" he said this as if it was most obvious thing in the world. The little monster shrugged his shoulders at Shuichi's lack of words, "The place where the dead goes and all of us gods of death with our little notebooks are… and all that jazz…"

"Oh…" the pink haired pop star looked up for a while, a finger on his chin to mimic one in thought, "I always thought that reapers were at least tall or carried those big reaper things…"

"Tall! Well… excuse me for being vertically challenged!" the reaper stated angrily, "And for your information, you are describing a typical God of Death for _westerners_… those fat whites with their hamburgers and cheesy fries…" he shook his bejeweled head, "Think of all the calories they're taking in!"

"What? So you mean…"

"Yes, yes… it means that-"

"You really ARE a shinigami!" the boy excitedly clapped his hands, "That is so cool! So, what bring a shinigami like you here?"

The little monster had the urge to hit the clueless boy on the head, but he pushed it down.

"Yeah… I'm here because… you have a death note in your being that… belongs to me"

"Really? This belongs to you?"

"Yes, but now it belongs to you"

"It belongs to me?"

"Yes, it belongs to me"

"Really? Why?"

"Because you're the first human being to touch it… and that kind of thing, think Aladdin and the magic lamp…"

"Who's Aladdin? And what's a magic lamp?"

"Well… Aladdin is an Arabian dude who finds an old oil lamp…"

"What's an oil lamp?"

"Well… it's this thing Arabian people fill up with oil…"

"What kind of oil? Cooking oil? Gasoline oil? Baby oil?"

"Some kind of oil that they use for fire… hell, I don't know, I'm not Arabian!" he waved the questions away, "Getting back to the story, he finds the mystical magic oil lamp that is not filled with oil but with a genie…"

"Oh! A genie!" the cotton candy haired boy started to get hyper, "Aren't they like… they give you three wishes or something?"

"Yeah…"

"Are you a genie? Can you grant me three wishes?"

"No, I'm a shinigami, and the only wish I can grant is a death wish…" Shuichi pouted, right, he forgot about that. "So, okay… I own the Death Note…"

"Yes, and I'm here because I have to explain the rules to you"

"Wow, that's very convenient"

"I know, well… did you go through the rules and regulations, it's in Japanese. I don't think it won't be that hard for you to understand"

"Yeah, I did go over the rules…"

"Any names in the note?" the monster picked up the note, "Wow, no names! Don't you have any grudges or anything? What about that creepy looking blond dude?"

"Are you talking about Yuki?"

"No, the one with the weird outfits and stuff…"

"Um… K…?"

"No, the one who looks like a sugar daddy"

"Wait… let me think…" Shuichi pondered for a few moments, who were the other blonds he knew? Creepy and weird outfits? A blond who looks like a sugar daddy?

A light bulb sprung out of nowhere and flashed up, "Oh! You must be talking about Seguchi!"

"Yes, that guy… don't you hate him?"

"Well, I do have plans running in my head on how Tohma should die…" the pink haired boy cocked his head to the side "How did you know that?"

"Wouldn't you like to know…?" the shinigami replied, an evil grin starting to rise.

"No, not really"

"Oh…" the disappointment in his voice a bit evident, "Well… if you know…"

"No, not really…"

"Oh… okay…" the shinigami coughed up a bit, "Well… I think I should get you started with the rules…"

"Yeay!" the little pop star listened intently to the instructions.

"Oh and there is this little thing…" from out of nowhere, the monster pulled out what seems to be an eraser.

"An eraser?"

"It's not ordinary eraser… it's the Death Note eraser…"

A/N: The Death Note eraser… I heard it from another author. It's real but was (obviously) never used in the Death Note series. It was published in a separate book along with L's real name.


End file.
